It's not everyday that one gets invited into the house of the world's most famous porn star. According to her online journal at http://justjennajameson.com that doesn't always deter some of the more imaginative fans, like the guys that climbed over her wall to get a glimpse of her, before running from her dog Nacho as well as the cops, who tend to respond in record time to the emergency calls of beautiful porn stars in distress, clocking in at a mind numbing two minutes.

So I figured I could use my good fortune of having access to Jenna and her casa, to give something back to all those lonely and curious and insane fans out there, by having Jenna give me a tour of her house, Cribs style, and documenting it all for you. Unfortunately it was late at night when we finally got around to it, so the pictures are a little dark, and I suck at recalling where the paintings came from or who did them or how much they cost or what kind of imported wood or marble this thing or that is carved out of.  Somehow I suspect that many of you will be willing to overlook this fault of mine in exchange for the tour of all tours, through the house of the reigning Queen of porn, who can now proudly add the titles best selling author and Elite model to her credits. 

At any point during this virtual tour you can enlarge the pictures by clicking directly on them. Please keep your hands to yourself while you tour Casa De Jenna, and remember to send people here via a direct link rather than trying to boost the pix and repost them elsewhere. Karma is a bitch. If at any point during the virtual tour dizziness, nausea, vomiting, delusions of grandeur, or rectal bleeding occur, please immediately discontinue the use of Casa De Jenna and seek treatment from a qualified physician.

Rock and roll...

DCypher

 

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Okay, first and foremost, what kind of celebrity garage would be complete without the sporty yellow Lamborghini? Jenna Jameson has one, and she keeps it right next to the Porsche and all the other cars in her big ass garage.

She took it out for a spin while I was there, driving it up near Camelback for an all day content shoot for Club Jenna Inc. I would be willing to bet that she could sell rides with her in it on EBay and make a small fortune, not that she needs it.

 

 

This sad looking soul is one of Jenna's four house dogs, the middle sized one, and her name is Puff. Apart from giving slobbery kisses her job consists of sleeping and hanging out in every room of the house. What a lover!

She pretty much grunted and snorted and followed us most of the way along our tour.

By the end of all the rooms of the house, she was wiped out and laid down on the kitchen floor to catch her breath and dream of stinky cheese.

 

The outdoor pool at Casa De Jenna is pretty nice. Hidden around the bushes are several speakers that make the music sound like it just wafts in from some other ethereal realm. Not seen in this photo is the large patio that comes with the misters because it is hotter than fuck in Scottsdale and you need the misters to stay comfortable out there.

I don't know what kind of Japanese statue that is in the background either.

If I lived at Casa De Jenna, I would skinny dip every night though, I can tell you that.

 

This is one of the many statues at Casa De Jenna, which mostly consist of dragons, due to he husbands love of them. The attention to detail is intense with each one and they are scattered throughout the palatial grounds almost like gargoyles.

 

 

 

More decorative art that doesn't really show the room off or feature Jenna in it.

If you are anything like me, you are probably starting to wonder whether I actually was invited to the house or whether I scaled a wall and picked a lock.

Never you mind. Just relax and take it all in, all the splendor.

 

 

Nestled inside of her bedroom is a tree that hides one of the best paintings I have ever seen in my life.

We are getting closer to the good stuff now. Don't stray too far...

 

 

 

At last the first signs of life emerge from the enormous domicile, as we are greeted by Nacho the dog and Carmen. Carmen is actually more feisty than Nacho, but Nacho did playfully try to eat my hand when I first met him, so I wouldn't discount him. Plus he did try to eat the guys that came over Jenna's fence that time, which, according to her, is why she yelled at them to get out of her yard. She was worried that they would be mauled to death.

If you saw Nacho in action, you would understand why.

 

 

At last Jenna makes an appearance to show off her biggest dog, Nacho, and her smallest and most ferocious, Carmen. Carmen is pretty much a surly ankle biter, but looks so cute and harmless that you really don't pay much attention to her vitriol. Besides, I like vitriol in my animals.

All I can think when I see this picture is that Nacho could so easily eat Carmen for a snack.

 

 

This is the fireplace in Jenna's bedroom. It is directly across from her super large bed and right beneath the plasma screen mounted on the wall.

Naturally I asked her if she ever lights and uses it and she informed me that she does and that it gets pretty cold in the winter at night so a fireplace makes sense. Those must be some wonderful nights...

 

 

Quite possibly the most important room in the house is the jacuzzi bathtub room, where all the important decisions are made. Not to mention that it is proof that she doesn't always bird bath it or go Vegas style.

 

 

 

Entrance to the secret grotto inside Jenna's magical lair.

 

 

 

 

This would be her husband Jay's side of the closet. What you cannot see clearly from this photo of the walk in space are the huge pile of sandals hidden neatly in a corner, like discarded banana skins.

 

 

 

Inside Jenna's walk in closet, across the way from Jay's, a multitude of colorful handbags descends from the ceiling as if they were pinatas at a children's birthday party.

I especially liked the one of Marilyn Monroe.

 

 

 

I have to tell you that Jenna was not happy with me being in her closet because she thought it was too much of a mess. Frankly if she ever saw the inside of the shoebox I reside in with its piles of clean and dirty laundry and over 500 hundred books stacked around DVD's, computer equipment, television speakers, and stacks of porn, she would probably hyperventilate and be lost to us forever.

Suffice it is to say, her closet is clean enough for me, and big enough to house tons of apparel. There's like half a mall in her friggin' closet, and that's not taking into effect her dancing stuff in the garage. I asked her why she didn't have a computer running it all like Alicia Silverstone in the movie Clueless and she laughed at me.

 

I'm going to go out on a limb here and guess that this room is generally off limits to Jenna, since it's her husbands work office, and where he does all the editing for their movies.

There is a fantastic collection of guitars in this room too, old acoustic guitars, but time prevented me from shooting them. Don't get me wrong...it's not the collectables room. That room doubles as a gym with a plasma screen on the wall that played MTV 2 the whole time I was there. It was adjacent to the guest bedroom and had a boxing slash gangster movie theme going on.

We had better all leave now before Jay finds out creeping about in here.

 

Just one of the spare bathrooms in the house, and another chance to decorate it. One of the things I love about Scottsdale mansions is that they all seem to come with like 20 bathrooms in them so no matter where you are in the house you are never more than a spit away from the water closet. That must come in handy for some people.

 

 

 

Yet another statue, this one from the living room as you enter the house, yet this one features a naked lady that Jenna is molesting in the picture. That has to give it some kind of new value, right?

 

 

 

The magnificent piece of art in the living room comes from a small church in some South American land and is one of the most beautiful things I have ever seen. The minute I entered the house I was drawn to it, and it turns out to be one of the most fantastic and amazing things in their residence, which is saying a lot.

Unfortunately there is no good way for me with my little spy camera to fully show it off to you, but this picture captures a small glimpse of it nonetheless.

 

 

Sure this is more dragon art but there are also crosses. Casa De Jenna does seem to have a great deal of religious themes in it like religious paintings and crosses in all the rooms. Then again, Jenna is Italian, so you never know. I didn't think to ask at the time if they belonged to her or Jay.

 

 

 

Just more of the living room. It's hard to fit all into one shot. Jenna is doing a great job of showing it off for us though.

 

 

 

 

What house would be complete without the lowrider cholo bicycle? This one is famous, the best of its kind, and Jenna bought it for her husband as a gift.

Either that or she is just not telling me about her new gang associations. Maybe the fingers are actually gang signs?

 

 

 

Welcome to the dining room in Casa De Jenna. This is where big meals take place that involve family members and important guests and heads of state and stuff.

Along the wall is a cabinet with the fine china.

 

 

 

This painting faces the opposite wall of the dining room. It is just one of the many beautiful paintings Jenna and Jay own, since they collect art. They get a lot of it from famous artists that they know, according to JJ, but this one came from South America, and is religious in nature I believe. The man in the painting has a flat ring halo, which, if I recall my art history courses from college, dates this painting as being, ummm, very old.

Jenna tried to tell me it was a picture of Jay getting bathed as a kid but I didn't believe her.

 

 

No, I didn't just barge in on Jenna when she was using the bathroom. I knocked first and she told me to come in, or at least that is what it sounded like. I may need a lawyer.

I liked this bathroom a lot, which is near the laundry room and the kitchen, and has mirrors that cover every square inch of it and look like reflective rips in the wallpaper. You could get an interesting view of the processes of nature in a mirrored bathroom, if you catch my meaning, which might be very educational or completely unnerving. What I liked about the bathroom was that it came equipped with one of those HOW TO SURVIVE ANYTHING books as reading material. That is the kind of thing a guy wants to read while he does his business, like how to survive rolling out of a car at 50 MPH. That is the kind of stuff you tend to remember when you are in a tight spot...yeah...go ahead and laugh...suckers...

 

It's hard to tell what this room is, because it is so nice, but it is in fact....the laundry room. I couldn't get over it, to be honest, and took every chance I got to tease Jenna about how nice her laundry room is.

It really is fucking cool though.

 

 

 

This is just a little breakfast nook between the kitchen and the entertainment room, which differs from the living room, since it has the largest television in the house and the biggest fireplace.

This area has windows that face out into the backyard and the pool, which must be a pleasant view when you are eating your morning bowl of Frosted Flakes and uber buttery toast with jam and slurping on coffee while the dog licks your toes.

 

 

The television of the entertainment room is magnificent and large and the room has round, white, cushy sofas that make you feel like you are sinking into them. The last time I saw Jenna she was watching Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets in this room and totally engaged.

She thanked me for coming out to AZ and I thanked her for the tour and told her that I would let myself out. She gave me a kind kiss on the cheek and I wandered off.

 

 

 

I almost forgot the kitchen, which would be wrong, since Briana Banks told me that Jenna makes her special homemade macaroni and cheese in this room of the house and that she uses it to fatten up Briana when things weren't going so well for her in life.

One of these days, I am going to hit Jenna up for some of that Mac and Cheese, but for now our tour of the house of the world's most famous porn star has come to a close.

Be sure to thank Jenna for letting us come through her house, for being such a gracious host, by visiting her official site at http://clubjenna.com and seeing all the wonderful things she has to offer her fans. After all, it's the least you could do to click a silly little link and check it out after touring her whole house for free, you cheap bastards.